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July 13th, 2009
June 26th, 2009
06:35 pm
Right now, my work is alot more direct service than I thought we were allowed.
What I have done in the last 3 days:
Monitor Mosquito population in 4 sites around Cedar Rapids
Take blood samples from chickens in the 4 sites also
Do outdoor inspections to look for standing/pooling water from people who complain about mosquito populations
Check out complaints about rodents, feral cats, or any other wild animal that causes a threat for disease in the area
Check out indoor air quality inspections for mold, radon, and carbon monoxide.
Start researching for a grant on funding the indoor air quality division to help with asthma problems
made a powerpoint on Flood Preparation, Response, and Recovery
Attended a Board of Health meeting and CHAMP meeting assessing funding for asthma programs in Iowa.
Lots of stuff, HUH?!!!!
Now I just need to get focused on the most important things... or I'll just keep doing random projects
~Christina~
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June 22nd, 2009
05:46 pm
How is it even possible that I'm already getting asked to go on a date to see canyons on saturday with the most beautiful woman in the world? How did the kiss happen? How did I fly into this fantasy land?
She's so... wonderful.
We'll see... let this new one rollllll.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On another note, I had my on site training today and it was boringggggg, but I'm almost done! Soon I can dig right into the public health system and make people happier! But the happiness is of course EXTREMELY indirect and I probably won't see any appreciation, but that's why peeps become VISTA's, right? hehe...he...hehehe....uhh... yeah.. I know I'll be making lots of databases and...I like doing that... so that's good?
so....Iowa is really cool about gluten free foods in their chain store called HY VEE. They even have this shipping availability where if you can't find a food that you want, you can order it and they will have it in their store a week later just for you! How cool and accomadating for Tina is that?! Like whoa, dude.
I'm totally writing like how I speak right now. Sometimes improper writing is fun, though, and that's what livejournal is to me; a way of expressing myself without grammatically correct needs.
I like pomegranites!
I also went storm chasing last night and was legitly scared, but yet...I want to do it again.
Sincerely,
~Tina~
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June 17th, 2009
10:07 pm
VISTA people at PSO are crazy. Does that mean I am crazy too?
:/
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June 15th, 2009
01:01 pm
The department of human resources are so nice...
They realized I needed food stamps like...now. When I got accepted and found out that the card will come in the mail within the week, I was so relieved! I got back home as soon as possible and paid a bill that was 6 months late. Once I sent it into the mail, I cried. It was an odd feeling. I'm not sure if I cried because of happiness because that hospital bill won't affect my credit anymore or if its because I knew I was irresponsible by dancing alot for the past 6 months instead of saving so I could afford the bill in the first place...
All I know is that I still owe 800 dollars to the hospital and I still can't afford that right now. Its just really overwhelming to the point where you stop opening the bills because you just... don't want to know.
~Tina~
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June 12th, 2009
03:56 pm
Things to do:
Find a place to print papers needed for PSO
Go to post office and change mailing address (find post office)
Go to Filming to be an extra for a movie Sunday 6am.
Go to the Human Resources Interview to get food stamps on monday.
Pack on monday.
Go to PSO for Indianapolis Tuesday: Flight leaving 6:30 am.
Possibly find other vista's to carpool to airport?
Figure out what E-airline tickets means.
Go back to library once mailing address is secure so I can have a permanent library card instead of a temporary one.
Try and find a place that sells gluten free foods.
~Tina~
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June 11th, 2009
02:42 pm
Cedar Rapids, first look, seems really friendly. I hope it stays that way! I live in a 6 apartment complex and my next door neighbors teach violin and cello, so I get to hear that all the time. I'm actually quite a fan. My new roomate is the assistant manager to a movie theatre. She's saving up to be able to go to college and is only 19, but she seems really friendly. However, she works ALL THE TIME. I doubt that I will see her much. She said I can go watch movies for free at the theatre whenever I wanted, though *smile*.
My main problem has been internet. As you can see, I have it right now and I am in my apartment, but its only because I have a long 50ft ethernet cable extending into the living room, which disrupts the quaintness of the place. There's WIFI, but no matter what I do... I've tried 2 different wireless cards which are supposed to work with my computer and just... don't. So I think I'll just scarcely use the internet and do the plugging and unplugging of long ethernet cord while said roomate is at work and doesn't care about the cord ruining the apartment look.
My job isn't going to start until June 16th. Actually... it doesn't start until the 22nd, but I'm going to a pre service orientation June 16th. I got the online tickets and am all ready. Now I jsut have to learn my place around town for the next week and apply for food stamps because I am very poor. Until I get food stamps, it will be rice and beans for a while.
I didn't bring any books, so the first thing I looked for on the map was the library. I intend on going there today and getting a membership because I really want to be able to get lots of books read this year.
What else... I have this love life that started over in Massachusetts and I haven't figured out how to deal with Nathan. Whenever we talk on the phone, I just get sad. I need to find fun things to do on the phone so even if we don't commit ourselves to each other, I can have a pleasant friendship with him that will still exist once I get back there next summer. Nathan's a sweet heart...
Sincerely,
~Tina~
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June 7th, 2009
01:07 pm
For more of a personal way I am feeling... archive back to how I felt March 15th 2006, first entry. I relatively feel like that right now.
By the way, I really really REALLY want pen pals.
My address will be:
3730 12th ave. SW Apt. #5
Cedar Rapids, IA.
I'm not quite sure of the zip code? I'll update that later.
Sincerely,
~Tina~
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11:47 am - Starting Americorps
Basically, I'm moving to Iowa tomorrow. I think it just hit me today. I mean... its been hitting me for the past couple of weeks by saying goodbye to friends, but today I started thinking about all these questions I feel I need to ask my vista buddy. Today I actually have to map out how I'm going to drive to Iowa... where I'm going to stop on the way.. will I like my roomate.. how much corn is alot of corn? Will I be too shy? Will I really be able to do my job? What exactly is my job anyways? So yes... lots of questions have begun freaking my brain out. This is a major change for me. A change I need.
Also, I think I'm nervous because it wasn't until YESTERDAY that I got my still very vague job description for VISTA.
Responsibilities: - Partner with the Health Department to gather accurate and comprehensive information on the health affects of those who worked in the flood zone.
- Attain information of low/no-cost health care available in our area.
- Develop a medium to disperse information to appropriate members of the community.
My job seems to have less responsibilities than the other VISTAs, but perhaps it will need to go in more depth than the others? Still.. I will find out significantly more soon enough. I start my on-site training June 20th and my Pre-service Orientation (In Indianapolis!! yay!) June 16-19, so I will learn more than. For now, I wait in the world of vagueness. Is that just... how it works in Americorps?
Sincerely,
~Tina~
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May 16th, 2009
01:14 pm
Not having internet available will be interesting and it starts now.
I'm still in Plymouth, but I dont have internet at my house and now the school is shut down so I have to use the public library. I was going to write something large about my friends graduating and everyone diverging into their own vector path, but the librarian says I need to get off because I'm a "guest". I wonder if it will be like this at Cedar Rapids. I'm leaving for Iowa June 8th and hope to catch up on seeing people that I havent seen in a long time. I seem to feel the need to stay connected with people quite eagerly with this move. It may be because I don't know if I'll return to the east coast after the year in Americorps or not. I just... don't know. That's what's scaring me so much. I've made so many good friends on the east coast....
okay.. gotta go.
~Tina~
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May 7th, 2009
06:21 am
"Character comes from following our highest sense of right, from trusting ideals without being sure they'll work. One challenge of our adventure on earth is to rise above dead systems -- wars, religions, nations, destructions -- to refuse to be a part of them, and express instead the highest selves we know how to be. "
This comes from the book "One", by Richard Bach. I would like to read it again sometime....if I can find it.
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06:00 am
I wonder what has happened to me. When I was young, I would live at my parent's house and creep down into the basement. There would be foreign books, philosophy books, science books, hundred of national geographic magazines, different atlases and maps, and many hard covered books full of photography because my father used to be into that for a while.
I just returned to Brunswick again.. looking around for things because I'm moving to Iowa and need to know what to bring there. I realized though, how I don't get inspired with the things in the basement anymore. Was it a youthful education curiosity that just can't exist anymore, or is it something else? Really... what captures my eye now a days? How often do I see a book and just sit down and read it without thinking about a boy or my future or having to be late for work? I can't focus on fun inspiration like I used to. Maybe I need to work on that.
I did look down there and see pictionary, boulderdash, boggle, scatigories, scrabble, monopoly, and get to the head of the class. I need to buy games for myself, because I really am a board games type of person. I don't enjoy drinking parties, unless it involves board games, and I enjoy thinking as part of fun and socializing. That's why I like the contradancing people so much. Bringing chess and Go to Uno's is just so amazing. I hope I can' find such friends out in Iowa, but those people in which I speak of can never be replaced in my heart *smile*.
In anycase... I realized how much I miss the book Jonathan Livington Seagull and I think I may read it again. I mean.. it was my favorite book for a few years and all.
Sincerely,
~Christina~
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May 5th, 2009
10:30 am
Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more humans. This article focuses on the notion specific to interpersonal relationships. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism.
Go Wikipedia!
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07:41 am
I have not moved in such a long time. I've dobn't even call college really "moving". In the past few months I've made so many connections with contradancers and it really will be hard to move away from that happiness in my life. I'm just really hope this Americorps thing in Iowa is a good idea.
I seek adventure all the time and have not had nearly enough yet in my life. I shouldn't be afraid. I know me. I know I'll make friends quick over there. I'm working Americorps VISTA in Cedar Rapids, Iowa as a flood recovery program coordinator. I really think this will give me a great time to be able to really help people. I have been so desperate in wanting to actually help the world lately, instead of just being an auditor at Walmart.
I feel as though walmart has... numbed me... made me apathetic towards hard work and made me forget what motivation and love for the earth felt like. I want to feel.... unconditional love again... open hearts... people not caring if they are rich or poor as long as they can exist in this beautiful world.
I think Iowa will wake me up.
I'm leaving June 7th and will be staying with this awesome guy named steve. He seems really laid back and friendly. The apartment is 20 streets from my work, so I can most definitely bike to work at least in the summer. I'll be right next to a ball park and a few blocks away from a football stadium. The library isn't far away either *smile*. Everyone told me, "Hey Tina... I hope you like corn.", but I think Cedar Rapids will actually be the most metro place I've lived in with a population of 150,000 people. Also, if I ever have time (probably not) and money (probably not) then I'll visit Joel over in Chicago which is only 4 hours away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, my love life will have to be on stall for now. I want to go over to Iowa to help people, not to fall in love and to get laid. Also, I will somehow have to leave my feelings for Duck and Andrew back in New England. I wish I didn't have to leave my feelings for Duck here, but he's just... too inspiring for me. I'm thinking about becoming a vegan again because of him, totally ditching the use of cars, and the thought of coffee. Maybe I'll write him letters or soemthing....
Andrew loves me but is not in love with me. Its been that problem for the past year since he broke up with me last June. I keep thinking that someday he'll just look at me and ask me back, but... I need to give up on that hope. I mean... we're still intimate and its like we both want to be with each other, but know that it just... can't happen. Heart ache happens too often with our friendship.
Ani Difranco is what I need to feed my soul right now.
I love you,
~Christina~
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April 27th, 2009
07:06 pm
Its never good when one can't even write something in their open journal because the only things they are thinking of saying are too depressing..
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April 12th, 2009
11:17 am
Upset...lonely... Unhappy.... Lacking confidence.. Lacking a home, unsecure.. impatient.
Wanting a Hug.
Jesse?
Today will definitely be a new day. May go down to Massachusetts regardless of my financial status. It is very true that contradancing keeps me sane. Why did I decline that transfer offer? God damnit.
~Christina
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March 30th, 2009
09:01 am
I want to be able to love someone besides Andrew right now...
I really need to move away from him.
This lack of getting over him is unhealthy.
My life is great right now, though *smile*
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March 27th, 2009
09:19 am
I must note how amazing my friend and coworker's donuts are in the Walmart bakery. Ever since she started working in the bakery, the donuts have been every such color possible, bright and bursting, with the most beautiful sprinkles in the world!
Her donuts make me happy!
~Smiles~
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March 25th, 2009
09:27 am - cloud nine possibly
I always seem to really enjoy life on Tuesdays.
Monday and Tuesdays are the nights off from work usually and I almost always come down to southern NH or massachussetts to go dancing or visit friends. Staying at piskorski's is so relaxing! He has a large heated mattress that I take advantage of almost every week. This helps me catch up on much needed sleep (sometimes for over 12 hours at a time on that mattress) and just relax. I open my mind up to thinking about more than just bills and possible jobs that I can be qualified for. I think aboiut great food at trader joe's, how the genes for eye color really work, if gun safety should be taught to everyone. I feel like I have better potential to grow into an intellectual down here than back up in plymouth where I am just going to work and the magazines in the break room are about brangelina.
If I visit my friends who go to college on a tuesday, I have the chance to roam free while they are in classes. I tend to go in the library (because its still rather cold) and look up just... random things in journals. What was I reading last thursday at Brandeis..? Last thursday I read many of the newspapers like New York Times and the Boston GLobe. I also read child education census's on life variable comparisons between dropouts vs. non-dropouts. I wish the plymouth library had better resources that I could get hold of like Umaine Orono and Brandeis does. Sometime on a Tuesday, I should go to the MIT library and see what they have!!! However much I like the Brandeis and Umaine library, I havent been able to find any meteorology journals or...anything atmospheric. Brandeis had many astronomy planetary type journals and Umaine had some air quality environmental stuff, but for physical atmospheric sciences, MIT would have a much greater chance in handling that kind of stuff. MIT also has a meteorology department.
Speaking of Brandeis, I was able to go on an absolutely fabulous date with Alan this Monday. Not to mention an amazing sick time last thursday (you'd have to be there to understand). He's so... darn wonderful. Lets think about this... in a man I need someone who will understand my health issues. He definitely has that! I found out that he's had much more medical drama than me so the understanding is right next to me on that issue. Along the lines of that, I need a guy who finds it very important to stay healthy and in shape. I need someone who values their life and their body fully and wholly. Once again... he's in college to be a personal trainer later in life! I love having someone workout with me. I haven't had that in a relationship for a while. Then, I need someone who has at least one of the same hobbies as me. Contradancing, where I met him, marks that off. So, those are the basics. He also is crazy intelligent, loves to hug, doesnt mind public displays of affection AT ALL, loves spontaneity and romance... I don't know if I should just stay as giddy as I have been since thursday or if I should put on a caution sign because its too good to be true. I'm not sure yet. I like the giddiness right now. I just hope it doesn't end up crashing some how..
I feel like writing poetry. Maybe I'll do that, while I wait for a few hours to come to a close and I can visit Alan again. I'm going to be so sleepy tonight at work!
Sincerely,
~Tinamu~
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March 15th, 2009
08:50 am - The neck
My life has been really scattered as of late. I'm not sure what direction tomorrow is going to take me. I mean.... yesterday, an old friend called me up and decided to visit. I had no idea that was going to occur. What's going to happen tonight? Tomorrow?
I always talk about my love life or lack there of in here because I guess its the dramatic or... gossipy part of my life. The rest of my life is just going through out the months paying bills seeing some new things, but mostly just trying to stay stable and out of trouble.
Lets talk about this new boy! *giddy Tina time!*. I don't know him. I haven't even really held a decent conversation with him, besides the small talk before a dance commences. However, we've been contradancing together for a few months now. He goes to Brandeis and his name is Alan. His energy just keeps me all smiles around him and I am nothing but giddy around him. Usually I have to be the one that asks him to dance, but on Thursday, he asked me. Wait..... lets back track to December. The first time I danced with him I felt this.... presence with him. I didn't even know his name, but I called him my "dancing soulmate". There was no awkwardness where he would try to spin me too many times or grope me. He also was not too boring. He always did this thing where when you were balancing before the swing he threw his arm up in the air with excitement! It kind of reminded me of Alex's flamboyant hand gesture before the swing. Hmm....correlation...I don't know. (Note: Alex's very cute flamboyant hand gesture! Anyways....). At the snoball, I adored Alan's hat and we switched back and forth wearing his hat during the dance.
So flash forward to this thursday. He askd me to dance, but it ended up being a walktz, so we waltzed intead (yay!). His glasses were falling down and I told him that the fact that his glasses don't fit were really cute and he told me that I was cute too. I adjusted his glasses. I don't really know how to be subtle with my crushes. I'm working on it, but it just... doesn't work. Later on, he asked me to dance again! This dance I think was the best choice to have danced with Alan. There was a gypsy involved and a hay for 4 where Alan could walk backwards and I could keep eye contact with him pretty much the whole time. There was so much flirting involved I couldn't handle it! My heart was just... beating so fast and I became faint and breathless. I was indeed giddy. We finished the dance and he gave me a deep dip almost having my head touch the ground. Once I got back up he gave me this..... huge hug.... an embrace. I felt something. This chemistry is different from the chemistry that I feel from other good contradancers. I mean, yes I have a crush on him so its going to make this feeling during the hug bias, but there was something there! Then... the dance was over... I was packing up, saying goodbyeto everyone, getting ready to go off to UNO's when Alan comes up to me again (which he's never done in the past). He told me that he really wanted to go to UNO's but his friends that were carpooling with him didn't so he wasn't going to be able to make it. Its like he.... knew and intuited that I wanted him to go so we could actually have a conversation out of contradancing. He then gave me another huge embrace... my cheek up against his cheek. I held there... my mouth right in the crevass of his neck... once again....I felt faint. I didn't want to let go. This moment was perfect.
But yes, I don't really know Alan and its unfortunate that I live so far away from him....
I don't like looking at things realistically sometimes.....
Let me have a crush! Let me fantasize!!!
Crushing Very Hard,
~Christina~
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